Famous Dracula

Here is a little sketch I made with my good friend Steve for funny or die:

Famous Dracula - watch more funny videos

Thanks to the funny or die team for filming it and getting us a location.

On another note, with all the recent Oscar madness and the press obbsession with the big hitters it's very easy to forget the smaller films which were up for the less well reported statues. Animation, foriegn language, hair, so here is a link to the winner of this years *Short Film Oscar*
Simply, a triumph.

Sarah Palin - Fictional Character?

The more I read about would be U.S Vice President Sarah Palin, the more I think she is a fictional character from American sit-com Northern Exposure.

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/the_real_american_idol/article1687959.ece

Not one of the main characters mind, one of those larger than life nutjobs who would turn up once or twice a series with some strange ailment and would refuse to take any medicine and would probably wear a polar bear's head as a hat and a pair of dead beavers for gloves, or something.
I don't think that this is a good thing.

It wasn't me . . .

Spotted this letter in yesterday's The Sun

"Further to your report (Aug 22) about someone who shares my name, lives in the same town and is charged with having sex with a dog. I would like to make it clear that I am not involved in the case in any way. I accept The Sun's apologies for the distress caused to me and my family due to this confusion.
Thomas Matthew Fletcher
Tewkesbury, Gloucs"

So there are two Thomas Matthew Fletchers in Tewkesbury, one a suspected dog fucker, the other, not. Problem is, I still do not know which one is or is not. The Sun should publish a picture of the innocent party with the words 'Not a suspected dog fucker' written below it. It would look something like this:


Not a suspected dog fucker

I have used a picture of Harrison Ford to make my point absolutely clear.

Real name Paul Gadd

Just spotted this on The Sun website, they have dubbed Gary Glitter's recent travels as, 'Gary Glitter's World Tour'.

http://www.thescottishsun.co.uk/scotsol/homepage/news/article1592815.ece

For dates and venues see the sex offenders register.

I have also been reading a lot about the Large Hadron Collider experiment:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Large_Hadron_Collider

Soon to be up and running on the French/Swiss border. It's been in every paper, with posh pictures and diagrams a plenty (the graphics departments must have been on an all-nighter). It all sounds very exciting, but I won't pretend that I can understand a millionth of it. So i will go with what The Sun has decided it all means:

"End of the world due in nine days"

This is much easier to understand, because as we all know, if you unscrew your belly-button, then your bum will drop off. Take a look at their 'Doomsday Experiment' theory here:

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/features/article1630897.ece

It's worth a look for the rather dramatic picture of a black hole alone.

Other important news from The Sun:

"Drunk Lily tells Sir Elton to 'f*** off'"

Good.

Glitter baiting re-starts in earnest

The Sun's reports on Gary Glitter's release and return to Britain this week have had me captivated. They seem to love all of this a bit too much. My favourite avenue of journalism they have delved down is a handy pictorial guide to the 'Faces of a paedo'. This was the Sun's way of helping us spot Glitter in the various 'disguises' he takes on, like he is a glam rock version of the shape-shifting cyborg in Terminator 2. It even seems to claim that his famous 1972 big hair and sparkly jumpsuit combo was some kind of cunning paedo camouflage, hardly inconspicuous. In fact all of his many clever disguises (4) seem a little rubbish - bright red bandanna, black rimmed glasses and long, wispy goatee being his least likely look to help him blend in.

Well disguised or not, Glitter is going to be found where ever he tries to hide. The tabloid press scrum are making sure of that, as they chase him around the country, from bolt-hole to bolt-hole, like a frenzied, underfed pack of camera nosed hounds, chasing a bisto covered fox with legs made of chum and goose fat.